BARBIE AND KEN, AFTER 43 YEARS, HAVE ENDED THEIR RELATIONSHIP

I heard this ridiculous bit of news on the radio as I returned home today. Apparently Ken just couldn't commit, and Barbie didn't have time in her busy schedule to make the relationship work. My first thoughts upon hearing the headline was "Who cares?" and "How is this important enough to make the news?"

However, after a bit more thinking I realized that my initial reaction was naive. After all, as a reader of the Hamilton Spectator I should know how momentous are the relationships of the rich and famous. I've been hearing every detail of J-Lo and Ben's lives together. Are these two less vacuous, less plastic than their Mattel counterpart? Not by much, I'm afraid...